Time Travel – Desperately seeking a Singapore Sling

(This Postcard was written in September 2022, from Australia whilst preparing for my adventure to Singapore. I had only just started writing and admit to having little if any idea what I would say, how to start, or even if I could.)

Firstly, my apology: My Postcard Number 1 introduced my intent to write about my upcoming Journey to Singapore. Since then, 6 Postcards, no Singapore. Just, distractions, crossroads, sidetracks, and lame dabbling in some form of written Stand-Up Comedy. Ok, I admit I’ve been delaying, I have absolutely no idea what a Travel Blog is, let alone how to write one! So, how about I document what I know off Singapore? While I’m about it might even do a little time travelling to reinforce my knowledge.

Sir Stamford Raffles arrives.

Stamford Raffles rowed his pinnace ashore in Feb 1819, founding Singapore. With a ‘chilly bin’ full of Guinness he started a Pub, it became the internationally famous Raffles Hotel. A deck hand press ganged in Hong Kong, being of cultured upbringing, did not like drinking without food. Try these Singapore Noodles! Stamford’s French Chef, abhorred Guinness, saying: “Labière anglaise a le goût de la merde“, Aussie English translation meaning kinda: “English beer looks and tastes like something me bluey passed“: Try this Singapore Sling.

I first visited ‘Raffles Pub’ in 1986. It was somewhat run down and scruffy, rather rakish, and charming. Not very posh and none to selective about clientele, after all they let me drink in the main bar.

Singapore loves its Colonial Heritage.

Now ‘Raffles Pub’ is top shelf all the way. I took these photos a few nights back. Wet through, and rung out from walking Singapore: Well, I could not get in! Besides, $35 for a Singapore Sling, well that’s not really my cup of tea!

Without question ‘Raffles Singapore’ is the finest of the colonial architecture of Singapore, says a lot, because though the Singaporeans, were keen to see the British return to Europe, the Singaporean’s have spent considerable wealth maintaining the architectural heritage that remains in consequence of the British Empire.

Singapore, how did we get here?

Ok, that’s about my limit of knowledge on Singapore, other than:

The Singaporeans were mighty pissed in 1942, when Britain’s unconquerable armoured gunned fortress, fell quickly to Japan. The Japanese plan was really complicated: Let’s knick a pile of pushies from China, then ride down into Singapore from the opposite side of all those British guns. The British Commonwealth were dismally badly prepared for World War 2. One of many strategic failures was to underestimate the grit, tenacity and creativity of Japan. I suspect racism and bigotry played no small part in that.

In the 1950’s Singapore asked the British to go home. Unlike the French response to Vietnam’s similar request, surprisingly they actually did. Perhaps they remembered Publican Stamford’s advice:

“Better to walk out of a Pub Brawl, then been thrown out“.

Sir Stamford Raffles.

Singapore managed communism with just a little slaughter and mayhem, well by Vietnamese and Indonesian standards.

Singapore’s Prime Minister, Lee Kuan Yew, warned Australia in 1980, “You will become the poor white trash of Asia‘. Very surprisingly, Australia’s Prime Minister Bob Hawke agreed with him.

Singapore, myths, ripping yarns and lies.

So, all of my extensive knowledge is true, or perhaps not?

in Feb 1819, Stamford did indeed establish the Singapore we know. A little time travel to 0135BC finds Claudius Ptolemy, a Roman Geographer, writing of the existence of the geographic place we know as Singapore. Which, introduces another of my pondering obsessions: Just how much knowledge of the Ancient World has been lost? More so given in 1776, British Captain James Cook, after several weeks Rugby Touring in New Zealand, literally ran into an unknown Australia! An Island 10,700 times bigger than Singapore.

The Buddhist Kingdom of Sumatra actually founded Singapura in 1250. Singapura means ‘Lion City’ in Sanskrit. Remaining the National Symbol today. Genghis Kahn, obsessed about time travel, also had a penchant for ‘Duty Free,’ establishing a Singapore trade mission in 1320. Singapore is hence the oldest location where a thriving Chinese community existed outside China.

1613, the Portuguese destroyed Singapore. Why? Perhaps the sailors were thirsty, and no one loves A Pub with No Beer. Indeed, their time travel was 200 years too early. Singapore sank into obscurity until Stamford decided, what a great place to build a pub!

Cocktails, noodles and other truths.

Singapore Noodles, well they are actually ‘Hong Kong Noodles,’ created by Hong Kong chefs in 1955 to add a little panache, to oh so common stir-fried noodles. Perhaps, Singapore had already established its position as an Asian food paradise for international travellers.

Stamford’s pub did indeed create the ‘Singapore Sling,’ but in 1915. Bartender Ngiam Tong Biam, an empathetic soul, realised some ladies, actually like a serious drink, but walking around in those high heels and silk sarong kebaya, carrying a double scotch was, well not very lady like. But a pink coloured drink, with fruit and an umbrella: Who could possibly know it has 3 times the boot of Stamford’s Guinness!

The value of Travel.

I have to catch the post now, so, why did the British leave so willingly? Can wait for another Postcard.

“Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow mindedness.” So wrote Mark Twain in 1880, and it’s true. In our troubled international times, and abundance of open mindedness would surely be a positive attribute in all society.

Travel is excellent, even more inspiring when you actual know something about your destination.